Thursday, January 19, 2012

Loss.jpg pt.3

Valerie and her companions have finally tracked the elusive killer to his lair. It's time to end this.
And maybe if we're lucky she'll even be alive.

Oh look, more blood! Things are looking up already!

"Oh nooooo, blood, I can't deal with this!" -a literal blood mage.

Oh yeah, mom's been going down all right Hey, sexy...

It wouldn't be a murder investigation without a trash mob of evil spirits.

But what's that?
Oh please, your mother wouldn't be caught dead in those rags. (Is this more foreshadowing? Only time will tell!)

I'm disgusted, that wrinkly ho is busted.

Sorry, that was me, I had pickled nug hooves for lunch.

Valerie finds something on the ground.
Awww, how sweet Shobon

I would have thought the gallons of blood splattered all over the floor were a worse sign, to be quite honest.

Hey, I think this dude might me into necrophilia. Just a hunch.

Next up, Valerie and crew stumble across his bedroom and study, which is helpfully in the middle of his murder-catacomb.
"Ooh, I'm soooo uncomfortable here- oh, what a pretty little altar to the ruinous powers!"

 What the Hell?!

Yeah, I'm really sure this dude is cutting up a shitload of hookers and writing about how beautiful their hands are because they remind him of his sister.

But first, let's search this room some more.

Where indeed?

From the Kirkwall circle of mages! How helpful of them! I wonder who at the Kirkwall circle of mages this mysterious "O" could be?

Hmmm, I've got a bunch of dead hookers cut up for body parts, a picture of a woman that looks like my mom, and books on necromancy. what could possibly be happening?

This is it. This is the climax. It's all been leading up to this.
Nice skeletons. conveniently armed with bows already and everything. I wonder if we're going to have to fight them?

Actually, she came for CWC.

Damn, she actually did!

Valerie should really be more concerned about this whole "past tense" thing than she's acting right now.

Oh, you two know each other?

Valerie just accepts that of course they knew each other, who cares how?

Wait, what?

At no point do they explain why Quentin just coincidentally happened to murder his protege's sister.

Valerie remains oblivious to what everyone else figured out several minutes ago.

At no point is it explained why he didn't just have Gascard help him out with his research from the start either.

"No, it's cool, I really don't need to hear the part about the corpse-fucking."

Valerie attempts to talk some sense into the blood mage she barely knows.

"Hey yeah, let's trust this blood mage. Every single one we've met so far except this borderline retarded elf has been a total sociopath, but this one seems like a decent enough guy."

This entire scene is remarkably similar to what I imagine David Gaider's unveiling of the first draft for the DA2 script must have been like.

Bioware showcases their magnificently expressive facial animations yet again.

Oh look, the blood mage necromancer summoned a bunch of skeletons, what a surprise!

So there's like 5 waves to this battle, as you have to fight a wave of shades, skeletons, rage demons and a desire demon for each individual woman Quentin murdered, while Quentin remains invincible until you've killed all the desire demons. Gascard dies in less than 5 seconds.

Meanwhile, zombie mom is shimmyin' and shakin her shit for the entire battle.

Bioware FTW.


  1. Sweet merciful Christ, this is awful.

    Why would Gascard trust this coot?

    Will this important defining moment in Hawkes life have any effect in regards to her character?

    Other than giving the game more Darker, Sexier, Better, What is the point of this awful subplot?

    How Can Merrill still remain so oblivious to the dangers of Blood Magic?!?

    Thanks for putting up with this drivel Shadow Isaac.

  2. Yuck. That was really gross. You can still see the stitches! *gag* Awful, awful.

  3. The Hawke zombie-mom reaction shot is the epitome of B^U but in threee deeeeee~

  4. And todays expression is, drumroll... dull surprise!

    I'm not sure if zombie-Mom's grotesque appearance is more due to being stitched together haphazardly or to shiity model animation.

  5. Look at the neck stitches. They don't even meet because the model is so fucked up.