This thread is no longer acceptable.
It veers off topic more than a drunk fishtails on a back country road. Posting is crap, effort is flaccid, and frankly the LP itself defines mediocrity in new and tepid ways. Much like Dragon Age 2, this thread is filler. It is white noise. It is a radio tuned to an obscure AM channel playing day opera radio serials in a language you've never heard. It makes sense only because it speaks the universal lingua franca of failure. How fitting.
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Bloodmages Up, Hoes Down pt.2
When we last left off, Ser Emeric had dispatched Valerie and her merry band to investigate the estate of Garscard DuPuis, dude with a funny-ass name and suspect in the Kirkwall whore-murders.
Alright, let's get cracking on the DuPuis estate!
Well that looks... exactly like Danarius's house.
And it's full of shades! ...exactly like Danarius's house.
Gee Fenris, you think?
Hey look, just because sometimes a man just likes to dress up in women's clothing and shove a dagger handle-first up his hot hungry boypussy, that doesn't make him a serial killer, alright? Gender confusion is not a crime, even in Thedas.
Alright, now that we've straightened that issue out, let's see what's up in the bedroom.
I believe you, as r/mensrights has opened my eyes to the wide world of false rape accusations.
Look man, he's paying this whore good money for the wild-eyed hysteria, so she better be convincing.
There's a killer on the road His brain is squirming like a dragonling
-Jim Morrigan, Riders on the Storm of the Century
Well, it should be pretty easy to track down the only flower vendor in Darktown and find out who his clients are.
*sigh* "Why can't these vapids just stay quiet while I lock them in my bedroom?"
lmao he's a blood mage.
Let's face it, this dude looks nothing like the other blood mage that we ran into 3 years ago, plus he has a pretty good alibi for murdering Ninette given that he was in Orlais when she got killed. Besides, Valerie hews closely to the creed of Snake Plisskin as told on the Escape from New York commentary track: "Not my wife, not my life."
Coming up next: watch as Gascard DuWiebe challenges Bloodmage Mitchell for the hooker-murdering world record in the Baron of Bloodmagery: A Fistfull of Dead Whores.