The Backwardsteve Marauders

So we're heading back to the barracks to- hey what's that?

Valerie regards the dead guardsman with a clinical glance.

Nice to see Aveline's neglecting her duties of reinforcing her subordinates and focusing on what really matters: getting porked.

It's both a smartass quip and a biting satire of the fundamentally limited nature of this game's entire design!

I laugh to cover up the pain.

That means nothing to me.

Holy shit you actually got trapped into playing a Bethesda game? That's the cruelest gameplay concept Bioware has implemented yet!

You're really in a position of authority here.

But rather... for a price.

I can't remember exactly what it was, but I'm gonna guess it was either 1 gold or 3 gold.

The last thing I need is more bullshit meatshields interfering with my right-clicks.

Truly, the Evets marauders were a formidable foe.

BOOYEAH

You know, I'm just gonna make a wild guess and say 'with their hands'. Just a hunch.

Are you telling me you haven't fucked one?

 

So we get back to the barracks and Valerie goes to talk to Aveline.

Haha just kidding fuck that. Time to get paid.