Friday, December 9, 2011

Balls Deep pt.1

And now, after countless shitty sidequests, it's here: the legendary Deep Roads expedition!
Yeah, I went out and actually earned some money, unlike you, you lazy sack of shit.

Alright, you got me: I actually spent it all on rings that give me +2% to critical chance and now we can never proceed with the game. It was fun while it lasted.

You know, considering you stood around with your thumb in your ass while Valerie did all the work and Varric wasn't even in my party for most of it, I'm pretty sure she deserves way more than you two.

You didn't even have a plan how to get in? What kind of preparation did you even do for this half-assed operation?

Bioware knows their fanbase.

And with that we prepare to embark upon our journey!
bartrand thrustin his stubby dwarf chode all up in them deep roads ohhhhh yeaaaaah The Ocean

Not playing this game.

Hey, it's that mom. -Leon Kennedy, Dragon Age 2
We ryde togetha, we die 2getha. Can't stop. Won't stop. Hawke crew. uh-uh uh-uh.

"Then no one would listen to me when I start whining and moaning!"

I don't know what she's talking about, because we killed a shitload of Templars in the chantry with no repercussions whatsoever.

SPOILER: it won't.

Silly Bartrand, the drama's never over in Dragon Age 2!

Okay, who's telling the story here, you or me?

I'm guessing she says this regardless of whether or not you side with the templars for the entire game.

It's cool that even the characters in the game are aware how pointless and terrible the entire plot of this act was.

Look, if you're referring to the Dog Lord genocide it's totally cool, they're clearly subhuman mudblood pawns of the international doglordry.

Wow. Way to impress your puritanical viewpoint on Valerie's promiscuity, Bioware. Can't you just let her be an empowered woman without resorting to gendered slander?
Even after having completed this act I'm still not sure what was down there that was so important.


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