This thread is no longer acceptable.
It veers off topic more than a drunk fishtails on a back country road. Posting is crap, effort is flaccid, and frankly the LP itself defines mediocrity in new and tepid ways. Much like Dragon Age 2, this thread is filler. It is white noise. It is a radio tuned to an obscure AM channel playing day opera radio serials in a language you've never heard. It makes sense only because it speaks the universal lingua franca of failure. How fitting.
Friday, November 18, 2011
The Dalish Mistake pt.2
So our band of mischief-makers heads on their merry way, dispatching
zombies as they go. Eventually we run into an extremely surly dalish
hunter who is pleased to see that we're taking Merrill out of the camp.
I see you, Jakesooly.
Valerie is confused in this upside-down world where other people are bitches and she's the sane one!
Ah yes, the Dalish are well known for their casual mageophobia.
No shit, they used to have a nose separate from their browline.
I say the same thing every time I sit down to write one of these posts.
She's waited a fucking year, I'm pretty sure a couple more minutes won't hurt either way.
GRAVEYARDS HIDDEN IN A DEAD-END CORRIDOR!
Oh look, a magical barrier. how will we ever get past.
Look at her perky little smile, she's so excited!
Merrill (in-game): (something unbelievably cute)
Sheryl: GIGGLESQUEE!!!!! SO CUTE!!!
Mary: Hee hee.
Sheryl: She's so adorable I love her and want to hug her omgIcan'tbelievehowadorablesheisCAN-I-NOM-HER-HEAD?!
Yeah, Valerie was having about the same reaction I was at this point.
Bethany is shockingly unimpressed by Merrill's self-mutilating tendencies.
You guuuuys, what's the big deal? I only summoned a demon with my blood to do my unholy bidding, I don't know what you're so upset about!
What you're failing to realize, Valerie, is that Merrill would be the most adorable monster since the main character of Haiyore! Nyaruko-san
She said, convincing no one.
Oh look, an altar, surrounded by corpses in the middle of a graveyard. I wonder what'll happen when I approach it?
It's not really conveyed through still images, but the Arcane Horror
stood completely immobile, not even an idle animation, while Valerie
hacked off around a quarter of his life bar.
Okay, lemme get right on that. But before I can get to the altar-
So basically Valerie doesn't open the barrier, never touches the altar,
and Merrill does everything? Remind me again why I needed to go on this
What a surprise! To absolutely no one!
Valerie mentally kicks herself for forgetting to check how much she could pawn the amulet for when Varric said he needed 50 sovereigns.
Eager to divert attention from how much money she just missed out on, Valerie changes topics.
The only thing plummeting into the abyss here is Bioware's standards.
Wow, that's pretty deep. it's almost like I've heard something like it before, though...
I'm going to regret installing this game.
omg I'm just picturing Merrill stumbling around in the dark with her
eyes closed and she's like "uguu~ oniichan, I can't see anything wauuu!"
and I just want to glomplenom her!
"You have my thanks (for spending money on this game) and my sympathy (for spending money on this game)."
I'm audi 5000! Peace out, bitches!
Flemeth will never appear again for the rest of the game.