This thread is no longer acceptable.
It veers off topic more than a drunk fishtails on a back country road. Posting is crap, effort is flaccid, and frankly the LP itself defines mediocrity in new and tepid ways. Much like Dragon Age 2, this thread is filler. It is white noise. It is a radio tuned to an obscure AM channel playing day opera radio serials in a language you've never heard. It makes sense only because it speaks the universal lingua franca of failure. How fitting.
Friday, February 3, 2012
This Epilogue Is A Charade
So Valerie allied herself with Gamlen's long lost daughter Charade, and
they killed an entire platoon of mercenaries that Charade had somehow
hired despite having no apparent means of obtaining such wealth. Oh and
there was a gem involved somewhere?
Hahaha, Gamlen sucks, huh?
Haha yeah, Gamlen sucks.
Well, I'd assume you meant it as one?
Reminder: you acted surprised that Gamlen never told Valerie about you.
Or, you know, kick the door in and kill everyone in the house. That always works when Valerie tries it.
But hiring several dozen mercenaries, that'd go swimmingly!
Wow, it's almost like you might not know him at all? #whoa #wow
And by "smells" I mean "smells your used panties". Oh also he doesn't bathe and stinks like shit.
valerie won't even let Gamlen into her mansion without putting on a
hyperbaric bubble because she's afraid he might get poor on something.
I DON'T GIVE A SHIT.
But yeah, why not try acting like a normal fucking person for once?
I... I don't care.
Says the man who still resents Valerie for not letting him kill his sister.
I don't even know who's saying this but it doesn't matter, it's still
ridiculous because nobody in this party is remotely capable of having a
rational emotional reaction to anything.
You look so happy about it.
And with that we instantly teleport to Lowtown in media res.
How do you not even notice your wife is pregnant?
Reminder that she only told Charade about Gamlen last year.
Oh my god could they not make him look like a sleazy child molester for just one scene?
This scene is so unintentionally perverse.
Valerie said, her voice dripping with innuendo.
HOLY SHIT, EYEBROWS!
Well, you said it last time we talked to you, but then you got all pissy as soon as money came up.
remember that gem this quest was supposed the be about? Neither do the
writers, because there's no resolution on that plot point at all!
Oh look, there's a letter waiting for us back at home!
Jesus Christ, how many visits with Gamlen did you get in on the the 30 minute walk Valerie took from Lowtown to Hightown?
Here's another one:
WHY THE FUCK DOES EVERYONE THINK VALERIE FOUGHT THE ARISHOK?